Listeners, Today I want to talk to you about the dangers of deer.
Are they beautiful? Yes. Are they graceful and picturesque, even borderline majestic beasts? Yes, yes, and yes. And, are they helpful to the community because real estate agents live inside of them? Of course!
But deer are also dangerous creatures. They are terrible, deceitful, and vile animals. I’m not being mean, this is just basic science.
Look, I know deer are cute and friendly-looking. We all remember adorable little Bambi, from the classic animated movie, with his sweet voice and white freckled rump. But we also remember the bloody end that he wrought on the humans at the end of the film, the graphic beheadings, and trees streaked with gore during the famous revenge-fueled climax.
The lesson of that movie, as in life itself, is that nature is gorgeous, and it is horrible, and it will kill you."
Welcome to Night Vale
Episode 36 - Missing(via nightvalequotes)